Garrett Hazen

Roseanne pretends to be ill in order to get some rest and relaxation to the exhaustion of everyone else in the family, who are at her beck and call. David discovers Roseanne's faking but when he confronts her, Roseanne strikes a deal with him that he reluctantly accepts. Meanwhile, Jackie confronts Beverly about being an awful mother and is stunned by her reaction.

Fred tells Jackie that he doesn't want D.J. to visit their house so much anymore, because he gets weirder every time he comes over. In order to protect Fred, Jackie tells Roseanne that she is the one who has a problem with D.J. constantly being at her house, which infuriates Roseanne. Dan tricks Darlene into coming home for the weekend and tries to make the girls stop bickering for their Mother's sake. D.J. expresses a strange, new fascination with eating cardboard.

In Roseanne's absence, Dan discovers something troubling about Jackie and gets some sound advice from David.

Dan lays down the law when DJ lets a pushy, aggressive girl order him around, but Roseanne likes the girl in question. But when the relationship lands DJ in trouble at school, Roseanne has to intervene. Jackie and Fred go to a marriage counselor to help solve their relationship problems.

Roseanne sparks a fight with Jackie when she feeds Andy junk food against Jackie's orders. Dan spends some "quality" time with DJ to show his son that he does more than watch television and drink beer all day.